the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
