True but thats because hes a fetus.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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