and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
