It's like a parade of train wrecks.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Randomize
