They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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