Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
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