I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I puked a lego.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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