u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
It's just like the Real World with babies
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
