Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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