And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Someone shattered a urinal.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
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