i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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