All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
