Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now

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(386): View more from Florida

Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .

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(845): View more from New York

I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"

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(250): View more from British Columbia

Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...

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(720): View more from Colorado

So you met him?

(1-720): View more from Colorado

More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.

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(218): View more from Minnesota

Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.

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(253): View more from Washington

It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.

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