I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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