fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
