Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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