? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
you inspire me to be a worse person
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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