Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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