I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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