Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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