Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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