I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
