PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
