Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
