it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
