there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
