how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
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