Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
he's gonorrhea incarnate
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
