Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
