its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
