I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
my shit smells like andre
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize