He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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