Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Where did you get a picture of my penis
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
she told me i tasted like america
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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