Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize