If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize
