It's like a parade of train wrecks.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
