this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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