i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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