I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
