hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Church boner. Awkwardddd
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Randomize
