Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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