He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
