wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
