We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Randomize
