idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
