Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
