it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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