If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize