I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
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