i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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